It’s time to set down the shame. Put it down. Walk away. This is not your burden to bear anymore. And anyone who tries to make you feel as though you are bad person because of the situation you ended up in… well, there is a special place in the afterlife for them. There they … More Set down the shame. Walk away.
I have been doing a lot of reflecting lately about my life. The other day a very strange thought crossed my mind. I remembered the reality of my life in the months before my husband died. I remembered the stress, the unkind words, the overwhelming waves of fear and pain and sadness. I remembered never … More How did I do that?
I am so tired of being censored from telling the truth. I have tried to submit real, honest articles to online platforms only to be given a hotline number and a brief “I’m sorry for your loss”. Nobody wants to talk about the real stuff. It’s not light, it’s not fluffy, there isn’t a trace … More The harsh realities of being widowed
On this day one year ago, we said our final goodbyes to Joshua. I don’t remember much about that day at all. I remember trying to eat a few bites now and again. I remember a lot of hugs and a lot of unbelievably sad faces. I remember a few people saying things I am … More The Final Goodbye
I realize this may not be an overly popular post, but I need to get this out there. Yesterday, driving home, I had a very painful realization sink in. I am no longer married. Of course, logistically, I have known this to be true. Since 8:41PM on September 9, 2016, I have legally been a … More I am not married anymore
One year. Twelve months. Fifty-two weeks. Three hundred sixty-five days. That’s how long I’ve survived without you. How is that even possible? Right now, in this moment, I feel like it is day one all over again. The pain is immense and raw. I feel like I lost an entire year of my life. It … More 365 Days
Two years ago today it was nearly 90 degrees outside, but we were determined to have an outdoor wedding. Determined to make all of our dreams come true. And so we did. Then one year later, we were at the most stressful point in our lives and our relationship. We were constantly on guard with … More A day to remember
A couple of weeks before turning thirty I was hit with “baby fever” – it came on out of nowhere and has been eating away at me ever since. In my early 20s I wasn’t sure about whether or not I wanted kids. I leaned closer to the side of not, mostly out of my … More What I never knew I always wanted (now that I can’t have it)
Today is the first day of September. A month that once held so much happiness. The cool, crisp morning air a refreshing reprieve from the intense heat of summer. Schools are starting, filling young minds with endless information. Leaves begin to change, showing the beauty of nature and that all things must go through a … More September, my former friend
This isn’t how I imagined entering the next decade of my life. I wasn’t supposed to be going to bed alone. I wasn’t supposed to be waking up alone. I was supposed to wake up to someone who loves me rolling over and saying happy birthday. I had everything going for me. I was married … More Entering a new decade